One of the most important things that you will ever need to understand, love and care for is yourself. The relationship you have with your own being is so vitally important in your growth, success, and happiness. Yes, you may be single like myself, but I have learned that instead of dwelling on the lack of relationship in my life, it is better to be thankful for this season. Learn to love yourself and see yourself as God sees you.
There are countless verses in the bible that asks us to love, but they all generally finish with as yourself; “Honor your father and mother. Love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39). Even God asks us to love ourselves first, so it’s not selfish but a requirement for a good life.
Your singleness is not a time of sorrow, rather it is a time where you can understand who you are in Christ, it is a time that you can be made whole. I have learned that a singleness season that is intentional and focused will create long lasting changes. There are things that God wants to communicate with you that He cannot when you are consumed in a relationship…particularly one that you are not supposed to be in.
Don’t look at your singleness as a time of mourning but more so as a time of growth and preparation.
I believe that God seeks our happiness in every season of our lives and singleness should not be excluded. You had a purpose before you were born; so DON’T WAIT for a relationship to begin achieving that purpose.
You are God’s creation, and you deserve the absolute best, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. It is ok to nourish yourself and to treat yourself as the queen that you are. So how do you maximize you singleness?
- Take yourself out on a date. Take some time off weekly or biweekly to do something that you like to do by yourself and do it. I love a good a pedicure, so sometimes I go in with a journal and just sit, reflect and write as I get my nails done.
- Enjoy not having a husband and children to take care of, sleep that extra hour. Any maried woman and mother will tell you that taking care of a family is hard, it is burden that you should not call before its time. Enjoy these years of freedom.
- Be adventurous. Do things that you know will be harder once you settle down. It will probably be a lot easier to backpack around the world now than it will be with a family.
- Empower your mind with good words that will help you grow physically, mentally, intellectually, and spiritually. Read, read, read, this is a time of growth and streching. Fill your mind with as much information as possible.
- Exercise and eat well. Learn to live a healthy lifestyle. Take care of your body as unto the Lord, remembering that it is God’s temple and not your own. if you dont make a healthy lifestyle a priority now, it will be a lot harder later on.
- Learn how to take care of a home. cooking, cleaning, decorating, budgeting. In the days of youtube, there is no reason why you cant learn everything that you wish to learn.
- Pursue the projects that God has laid in your heart. Whether it is a degree, job, ministry, pursue it with excellence. Girl, you want to be poppin when you meet that man. How boring would it be when someone does come along and asks you what you have been up to and the only thing you can say is ” day dreaming about you and sleeping”. Sis, get to work! we need you out here!
- Enhance your prayer life. ‘ Pray without ceasing”
One easy way to never be fooled in life is to know the truth. If you know just how beautiful God sees you then you will not fall when someone says otherwise. The best way to thrive in your singleness and understand who YOU are is to spiritually thrive. We are nothing apart from Jesus Christ and the moment we understand this is the moment that we start seeing life altering changes.
Your relationship with Christ is not like any other relationship. You are in him and he in you.
God is ready to speak to you, he wants to give you “ wisdom and insight. Making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose.” (Ephesian 1:8-9). Don’t be fooled by what the world tells you; identity is not found in money, people, sexuality, fashion, or career, your identity can only be found in Christ.
5 ways to better your spiritual life and understand yourself To Maximize Your Singleness
- Whatever you have done against God’s name, repent. The Lord will separate you from your sins as far as east is from west.
- Model your relationship with Lord after Jesus’s relationship with the Father. Jesus centered his life around God the father, he depended on the father for daily direction, power, and provision.
- Pray, and worship the Lord for all He is.
- Study the word so that you may know the truth to life.
- Surrender your understanding and your life to God. “ Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God”
You are a beautiful creation made by God; he created you in his perfect image. Do not be bitter about your singleness, instead take it as a time to truly learn your identity, purpose, and the works of your creator. Do not wait to be happy, to pursue your purpose, and to live well.